;)
The Commentariat -- June 27, 2021
Afternoon Update:
Burgess Everett of Politico: "President Joe Biden's domestic agenda appears back on track in Congress, with Republicans praising his newly clarified approach to their bipartisan infrastructure plan and a key Democrat endorsing work on a separate, larger spending package. Two GOP negotiators [Mitt Romney & Rob Portman] on the bipartisan infrastructure deal said Sunday that they were mollified by Biden's Saturday statement vowing to support the bipartisan framework on its own merits, rather than withholding his signature until he also received a larger, partisan proposal. Many Republicans interpreted his remarks in the aftermath of their deal on Thursday as an implicit veto threat."
Marie: Even though I'm no fan of Jonathan Karl's, and even though I don't have a subscription to the Atlantic, where this interview is published, I'm using one of my few Atlantic freebies and linking it here. It's worth a read: ~~~
If there was evidence of fraud, I had no motive to suppress it. But my suspicion all the way along was that there was nothing there. It was all bullshit. -- Bill Barr, to Jon Karl ~~~
You know, you only have five weeks, Mr. President, after an election to make legal challenges. This would have taken a crackerjack team with a really coherent and disciplined strategy. Instead, you have a clown show. No self-respecting lawyer is going anywhere near it. It's just a joke. That's why you are where you are. -- Bill Barr, to Donald Trump, Dec. 1, 2020
~~~ Jonathan Karl, in the Atlantic: "... few betrayals have enraged [Donald Trump] more than what his attorney general did to him. To Trump, the unkindest cut of all was when William Barr stepped forward and declared [on the record, to Michael Balsamo of the AP,] that there had been no widespread fraud in the 2020 election, just as the president was trying to overturn Joe Biden's victory by claiming that the election had been stolen. In a series of interviews with me this spring, Barr spoke ... about the events surrounding his break with Trump." Barr & Mitch McConnell both confirmed to Karl that Barr had made the public statement at McConnell's request. McConnell had been telling Barr that if he -- McConnell -- made the statement, Trump might sabotage the two Georgia Senate runoffs. Karl relates Trump's meeting with Barr right after the Balsamo story hit the fan. ~~~
~~~ Tom Sullivan republishes some of Karl's story in Hullabaloo. John Amato of Crooks & Liars has a bit more of it. ~~~
~~~ Tom Boggioni of the Raw Story publishes some reactions to Barr's rehabilitation interview. Cheryl Rofer of Balloon Juice has more of the same. ~~~
~~~ Rick Hasen: "As is typical in pieces where people from Barr world are sources (in this case Barr himself), this paints Barr in the best possible light. The piece does not even mention how Barr put forward outrageous and ludicrous statements about voter fraud before the election, suggesting that foreign governments would be mailing in thousands of absentee ballots. Barr continues on his rehabilitation tour.... [Meanwhile,] Mitch McConnell utterly failed in squelching the Trump voter fraud claims because he was trying to preserve his Senate majority.... As Quinta Jurecic put it: '... this reads like ... the senate majority leader asking the attorney general for political help in an upcoming election. Not great!' But it's even worse than that. McConnell knew Trump's claims were bogus and endangering the country. And he refused to speak up because he put politics before country."
~~~ Martin Pengelly of the Guardian: "Donald Trump's 'big lie' that he lost the 2020 US election because of voter fraud is 'a bit like WWF', Mitt Romney said on Sunday, referring to the gaudy and artificial world of professional wrestling, an arena in which Trump starred before entering politics. 'It's entertaining,' said the Utah senator and 2012 Republican presidential nominee. 'But it's not real.' Appearing on CNN's State of the Union, Romney was asked about former attorney general William Barr's assertion to the Atlantic on Sunday that Trump's claims were always 'bullshit'.... Romney suggested most Americans have always known Trump is lying about electoral fraud, which he was told about by conspiracy theorists -- 'the MyPillow guy [Mike Lindell and] Rudy Giuliani' -- rather than any official source." Romney went on to say that autocrats around the world are using Trump's lies about the election to undermine democratic principles. ~~~
~~~ Marie: Of course Romney is wrong. As Pengelly points out, most Republican voters still believe Trump won. But worse, the January 6 insurrection probably would not have happened had Republicans all accepted Biden's win in November and isolated Trump as nearly the only Republican official in the U.S. who didn't have the guts & grace to congratulate Joe Biden.
The New York Times' live updates of Covid-19 developments Sunday is here.
Adam Clymer of the New York Times: "Mike Gravel, a two-term Democratic senator from Alaska who played a central role in 1970s legislation to build the Trans-Alaska oil pipeline but who was perhaps better known as an unabashed attention-getter, in one case reading the Pentagon Papers aloud at a hearing at a time when newspapers were barred from publishing them and later mounting long-shot presidential runs, died on Saturday at his home in Seaside, Calif. He was 91."
Jason Horowitz of the New York Times: "A leader in the Roman Catholic Church's effort to reach out to L.G.B.T.Q. Catholics revealed on Sunday that Pope Francis had sent him a deeply encouraging note, capping an especially disorienting week on the Vatican's attitude toward gay rights. On Tuesday, the Vatican confirmed that it had tried to influence the affairs of the Italian state by expressing grave concerns about legislation currently in Parliament that increases protections for L.G.B.T.Q. people. And days later, the Vatican's second in command insisted the church had nothing against gay rights, but was protecting itself from leaving the church's core beliefs open to criminal charges of discrimination. Nearly eight years after Pope Francis famously responded, 'Who am I to judge?' on the issue of gay Catholics, it has become increasingly difficult to discern where he stands on the issue. A growing dissonance has developed between his inclusive language and the church's actions."
~~~~~~~~~~
Emily Cochrane, et al., of the New York Times: "... in a stray comment during a news conference [Thursday] an hour [after announcing a bipartisan infrastructure deal], the president blurted out that he would not approve the compromise bill without the partisan one. 'If this is the only thing that comes to me, I'm not signing it,' he said, answering a question about the timing of his legislative agenda. 'I'm not just signing the bipartisan bill and forgetting about the rest.'... It was enough to upend Mr. Biden's proud bipartisan moment.... 'We never had an inkling that there would be any kind of linkage,' Senator Susan Collins, Republican of Maine and a key negotiator, said in an interview.... Liberal Democrats scoffed at the Republican frustration and accused their counterparts of looking for an excuse to oppose the deal, even though the Democrats' pursuit of reconciliation had long been public.... The drama does not appear to have sunk the deal, but Mr. Biden admitted that his comments on Thursday left 'the impression that I was issuing a veto threat on the very plan I had just agreed to.' That was 'certainly not my intent.'..." he added.... On Saturday, Mr. Biden finally acknowledged his mistake as lawmakers and aides signaled they would move forward with writing text and securing support. 'The bottom line is this,' he said. 'I gave my word to support the infrastructure plan, and that's what I intend to do. I intend to pursue the passage of that plan, which Democrats and Republicans agreed to on Thursday, with vigor.'" ~~~
~~~ Natasha Korecki & Christopher Cadelago of Politico: "Not 48 hours after President Joe Biden had appeared to seal a landmark deal with Republicans, he was on the phone trying to save it. Biden himself was making calls to members of Congress in an effort to salvage a nearly $600 billion infrastructure package, two people with knowledge of the calls said. That was just one of the many steps Biden, top aides and allies were taking to avoid an unraveling of an agreement after the president in a press availability infuriated Republicans by threatening not to sign it if he wasn't also sent a Democrat-only spending bill. Biden acknowledged he erred in a lengthy statement he released on Saturday where he issued a complete reversal to his previous comments." ~~~
~~~ Here's President Biden's statement.
Pride is back at the White House. -- President Biden, Friday ~~~
~~~ Annie Linskey of the Washington Post: "Standing at a lectern adorned with the presidential seal in the East Room of the White House, a transgender activist announced his pronouns before introducing the president. President Biden started his remarks by wishing a belated happy birthday to the husband of Pete Buttigieg, his transportation secretary. Later, the commander in chief of the world's most powerful military recognized a transgender lieutenant colonel who attended in full dress uniform, saying to her, 'Thank you for your service to our nation.' Those acts were part of an event billed by the White House as a commemoration of LGBTQ+ Pride Month, and each would have prompted headlines just a few years ago -- and some just a few months ago. Yet on Friday, none of it was particularly remarkable.... A key part of Biden's remarks was a call to the Senate to pass the Equality Act, which prohibits discrimination on the basis of sex, sexual orientation and gender identity. 'Our work is unfinished when a same-sex couple can be married in the morning but denied a lease in the afternoon for being gay,' Biden said, urging Senate approval. 'Something is still wrong.'" Politico's report is here.
Hanna Trudo of the Hill: "Democrats pressuring Sen. Kyrsten Sinema (D-Ariz.) to abandon her defense of the filibuster say there's little evidence to support her recent argument that getting rid of it would be an invitation for partisan seesawing on major legislation. ObamaCare has endured the test of time, the Democrats note. And while there might be some nibbling on former President Trump's tax-cut law without a filibuster and Democrats in control of the White House and Congress, large portions of the law are considered safe. Such lasting legislative victories suggest Sinema is wrong, the Democrats say, when she argues that ending the procedural Senate rule would prevent Republicans or Democrats from passing laws that have proven to be durable."
Luke Broadwater of the New York Times: "For weeks, Michael Fanone, a Washington police officer who was seriously injured during the Jan. 6 Capitol riot, had asked to meet privately with Representative Kevin McCarthy of California, the top House Republican, to discuss the assault, to no avail. So on Friday, when Officer Fanone finally got his session with Mr. McCarthy at the Capitol, he had a clear request at the ready: for the minority leader to publicly denounce the lies Republican lawmakers have been telling about the deadly attack.... He wanted Mr. McCarthy to push them to stop downplaying the storming of the building, blaming left-wing extremists for an assault carried out by ... Donald J. Trump's right-wing supporters and spreading the baseless conspiracy theory that the F.B.I. secretly planned it. He came away disappointed. 'He said he would address it at a personal level, with some of those members,' Officer Fanone told reporters after the roughly hourlong meeting. 'I think that as the leader of the House Republican Party, it's important to hear those denouncements publicly.' Mr. McCarthy, who phoned Mr. Trump during the riot to plead with him to call off the mob and days later said the president bore responsibility for the rampage, has since swung wildly in the other direction.&" The AP's story is here. (Also linked yesterday afternoon.)
Don't know how I missed this, but I did: ~~~
~~~ Katelyn Polantz of CNN (June 23): "An alleged member of the Oath Keepers pleaded guilty on Wednesday to charges related to the January 6 insurrection, the first plea deal among the Capitol riot cases against extremist groups. Graydon Young, a 54-year-old from Florida who went by 'GenXPatriot,' is charged in a 16-person conspiracy case alleging members of the Oath Keepers plotted to carry out the January 6 insurrection. It is the first guilty plea among any defendants in the major Capitol riot conspiracy cases and is a significant development as investigators continue to pursue leads on extremist groups that they believe planned for an armed attack to help ... Donald Trump and stop Congress from certifying the 2020 election."
To Protect & Serve. Chris Joyner of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution: "When FBI agents in San Diego seized the cell phone of a suspected white supremacist last year, they discovered text messages with a Georgia sheriff's deputy boasting of racial violence and preparations for a civil war. The text message chain, called 'Shadow Moses,' between San Diego plumber Grey Zamudio, 33, and 28-year-old Cody Griggers, a former Marine and sheriff's deputy in Wilkinson County, revealed plans to steal explosives, dry runs with illegal silencers and boasts of racial violence.... Twin federal investigations resulted in the arrests and guilty pleas of G[r]iggers and Zamudio on illegal weapons charges that could put them in federal prison for a decade. Zamudio will be sentenced in July; Griggers in August. But Griggers' involvement shines a light on the growing concern inside the intelligence community about the far-right radicalization of service members and law enforcement officers.... The FBI described 'Shadow Moses' ... as a 'prepper' group where Griggers, Zamudio and possibly others discussed building illegal weapons, acquiring explosives, and plotting potential attacks. It was also where they expressed their white supremacist and anti-Semitic beliefs." ~~~
~~~ Marie: If there's one humorous note here it's that these anti-Semites are so stupid they don't seem to know that "real" Moses was Jewish. (I could be wrong here, but to find out, I'd have to learn way more about military video games than I care to know.) In the meantime, guys like Griggers are why I've always been afraid of the cops.
** Republicans, Still "Protecting Democracy Against 'Negro Domination.'" Adam Serwer Atlantic, in a New York Times op-ed: "Donald Trump has claimed credit for any number of things he benefited from but did not create, and the Republican Party's reigning ideology is one of them: a politics of cruelty and exclusion that strategically exploits vulnerable Americans by portraying them as an existential threat, against whom acts of barbarism and disenfranchisement become not only justified but worthy of celebration. This approach has a long history in American politics. The most consistent threat to our democracy has always been the drive of some leaders to restrict its blessings to a select few. This is why Joe Biden beat Mr. Trump but has not vanquished Trumpism. Mr. Trump's main innovation was showing Republicans how much they could get away with...."
If you'd care to read about Trump's first MAGA rally since voters forcibly removed him from the White House, Meredith McGraw of Politico obliges with this report.
Because Everything They Did Was Corrupt. Alex Guillen of Politico: "Two high-ranking Trump political appointees at the Environmental Protection Agency arranged for a pair of agency employees to reap tens of thousands of dollars in salaries even after they were fired, according to a report from EPA's Office of Inspector General. The improper payments were directed by former chief of staff Ryan Jackson and carried out by former White House liaison Charles Munoz, and totaled almost $38,000, according to the March report obtained by Politico via a Freedom of Information Act request. In addition, Munoz also received an improper raise and submitted 'fraudulent timesheets' that cost EPA almost $96,000, the OIG calculated. Federal prosecutors declined to press charges over any of the OIG's findings, and both men have since left the agency -- Jackson in February 2020 to be vice president for government and political affairs at the National Mining Association, and Munoz on Jan. 20, when the Biden administration took office." MB: The National Mining Association? Perfect.
Sarah Nir of the New York Times: "Johnson & Johnson will pay New York State more than $230 million in a settlement that also ensures the company will permanently get out of the opioid business in the United States, the state attorney general's office announced on Saturday. The settlement comes at a time when the opioid industry is facing over 3,000 lawsuits across the nation for its contribution to an epidemic of prescription and street opioid abuse that has killed more than 800,00 Americans in the last 20 years, according to the United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. And it came just days before opening arguments in a sweeping New York trial in which the company was to be a defendant. That trial will be the first of its kind to go before a jury, and the first targeting the entire opioid supply chain, from the drugmakers who manufactured the pills, to the distributors that supplied them, and a pharmacy chain that filled prescriptions for them." (Also linked yesterday afternoon.)
The Pandemic, Ctd.
Jan Hoffman of the New York Times: "The vaccination of children is crucial to achieving broad immunity to the coronavirus and returning to normal school and work routines. But though Covid vaccines have been authorized for children as young as 12, many parents, worried about side effects and frightened by the newness of the shots, have held off from permitting their children to get them. A recent poll by the Kaiser Family Foundation found that only three in 10 parents of children between the ages of 12 through 17 intended to allow them to be vaccinated immediately.... But with many teenagers eager to get shots that they see as unlocking freedoms denied during the pandemic, tensions are crackling in homes in which parents are holding to a hard no. Forty states require parental consent for vaccination of minors under 18, and Nebraska sets the age at 19.... Now, because of the Covid crisis, some states and cities are seeking to relax medical consent rules, emulating statutes that permit minors to obtain the HPV vaccine.... Increasingly, frustrated teenagers are searching for ways to be vaccinated without their parents' consent." MB: Where are you, CDC?
Berkeley Lovelace of CNBC: "The World Health Organization on Friday urged fully vaccinated people to continue to wear masks, social distance and practice other Covid-19 pandemic safety measures as the highly contagious delta variant spreads rapidly across the globe." (Also linked yesterday afternoon.)
Carl Zimmer of the New York Times: "Researchers have found evidence that a coronavirus epidemic swept East Asia some 20,000 years ago and was devastating enough to leave an evolutionary imprint on the DNA of people alive today. The new study suggests that an ancient coronavirus plagued the region for many years, researchers say. The finding could have dire implications for the Covid-19 pandemic if it's not brought under control soon through vaccination.... 'What is going on right now might be going on for generations and generations,' ... said David Enard, an evolutionary biologist at the University of Arizona.... Scientists looking for drugs to fight the new coronavirus might want to scrutinize the 42 genes that evolved in response to the ancient epidemic, Dr. [Yassine] Souilmi [of the University of Adelaide in Australia] said." (Also linked yesterday afternoon.) ~~~
~~~ Marie: Scientists make really amazing discoveries. I hope a lot of them will get to work on a cure for the stupid gene, the one that makes people denigrate science & scientists.
Beyond the Beltway
Florida. Mike Baker & Anjali Singhvi of the New York Times: "Three years before the deadly collapse of the Champlain Towers South condominium complex near Miami, a consultant found alarming evidence of 'major structural damage' to the concrete slab below the pool deck and 'abundant' cracking and crumbling of the columns, beams and walls of the parking garage under the 13-story building. The engineer's report helped shape plans for a multimillion-dollar repair project that was set to get underway soon -- more than two and a half years after the building managers were warned -- but the building suffered a catastrophic collapse in the middle of the night on Thursday, trapping sleeping residents in a massive heap of debris. The complex's management association had disclosed some of the problems in the wake of the collapse, but it was not until city officials released the 2018 report late Friday that the full nature of the concrete and rebar damage -- most of it probably caused by years of exposure to the corrosive salt air along the South Florida coast -- became chillingly apparent." The AP's story is here. (Also linked yesterday afternoon.) ~~~
~~~ Steven Mufson, et al., of the Washington Post: "Surfside officials worried about the potential for new disasters ordered inspections of buildings near the collapsed Champlain Towers South on Saturday, as fires at the disaster site smoldered and hopes of finding survivors faded. Rescue workers, armed with sonar and cameras, found three more sets of remains, bringing the total to five people dead and 156 others missing inside a haphazard heap of concrete and steel rebar. Officials warned that picking apart the heavy sandwiched apartments was a delicate and dangerous task and that progress would be slow. Officials said DNA samples collected from relatives of the missing would help in the speedy identification of those found.... Surfside Mayor Charles Burkett suggested residents of Champlain Towers North evacuate.... Miami-Dade County will launch an audit of all buildings five or more stories high and 40 years and older, Mayor Daniella Levine Cava announced at a Saturday morning news conference.... The collapse in Surfside could be a wake-up call for towns along America's coastlines." ~~~
~~~ Russ Bynum & Freida Frisaro of the AP: "The mayor of Surfside, Florida, said Saturday he is working on a plan to temporarily relocate residents of a condominium tower built by the same developer of the nearby building that collapsed earlier in the week. But Mayor Charles Burkett said he was not yet prepared to order everyone in the building to evacuate. Burkett had sought an emergency inspection of Champlain Towers North, which was constructed the same year and by the same developer as the crumbled 12-story Champlain Towers South. It sits about 100 yards (about 91 meters) away, along Collins Avenue, which runs parallel to the Atlantic Ocean north of downtown Miami."
Texas. Cassandra Pollock of the Texas Tribune: "A group that includes Texas House Democrats and legislative staffers is asking the Texas Supreme Court to override Gov. Greg Abbott's recent veto of a portion of the state budget that funds the Legislature, staffers there and legislative agencies. More than 60 Democratic members of the House signed a petition for a writ of mandamus, which was filed Friday morning, as did the House Democratic Caucus and the Mexican American Legislative Caucus, four state employees and the Texas AFL-CIO.... The petition argues that Abbott exceeded his executive authority and violated the state's separation of powers doctrine." ~~~
~~~ Marie: Since 1961 was the last time I had to know what a "writ of mandamus" was, I looked it up on the Googles: "A writ of mandamus ... is a court order issued by a judge at a petitioner's request compelling any government, corporation, or public authority to execute a duty that they are legally obligated to complete." So thanks, Greg, I guess.
Way Beyond
Turkey. MEANWHILE, in Istanbul. Kareem Fahim & Antonia Farzan of the Washington Post: "Riot police used tear gas and rubber bullets to disrupt the annual Pride parade, intensifying a crackdown on the march at a time of rising government hostility toward LGBTQ individuals in Turkey, advocacy groups say. At least 20 people were detained, local media reported. The Istanbul governor's office had refused to grant a permit for the parade, which has been held since 2003 but banned for the last seven years. Even so, hundreds of people, many waving rainbow flags, marched Saturday in the city's historical Beyoglu district, playing cat-and-mouse in back alleys with battalions of police officers who tried to prevent them from congregating on Istiklal Avenue, a hub for shopping and tourism."
U.K. Oops! Sex in the Age of Covid. Toby Helm, et al., of the Guardian: "Matt Hancock has resigned as health secretary after Tory MPs, ministers and grassroots Conservatives defied Boris Johnson and demanded he be dismissed from the government. The minister fell on his sword after a day that began with senior Tories observing a deliberate silence over Hancock's future -- seemingly to test public opinion in their constituencies -- before many later broke ranks to insist he had to go.... It is understood that Hancock had been considering resigning since Friday after his apology for kissing his closest aide, Gina Coladangelo, in his ministerial office -- in breach of his own Covid-19 rules -- failed to quell public outrage. The resignation is a massive blow to the authority of the prime minister, who had stood by the 42-year-old following his apology, declaring the matter to be 'closed'.... There were also reports that Hancock had told his wife of 15 years on Thursday night that he was leaving her. Before the story of his affair was reported in the Sun, Martha Hancock is said to have been unaware of it. It is understood that Coladangelo is also leaving her role as a non-executive director of the health department...." MB: But, but they had their shots!
News Lede
The New York Times is liveblogging developments in the Surfside, Florida condominium collapse.
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Reader Comments (9)
Well, I did read Politico's piece on the latest Trumpy rally. Those in attendance eager to re-boot the same old same old from the man they look to as their leader and savior reminded me of small children who want the same story read to them each night before they go to sleep– the language a security blanket of sorts–-OR a religious ritual repeated without any deep thought about its meaning–-if any. Fatty has wrapped them up in a false fairy tale that they need as much as he does. They feed off one another. It's really quite remarkable to see this play out while a new administration is forging ahead with a brand new trajectory. Once the Feds find fault with Fatty, will they still rally round? Or will they finally realize how much he has let them down.
And I thank M.B. for schooling us on the term "A writ of Mandamus"––ya jest neber ever knows when that might jest come in mighty handy.
@PD Pepe: You are the bravest political observer I know. Thanks for reading the Trumpy rally story for us. Your observation that his fans are like small children who like to hear the same fairy story every night is spot on. I never thought of it that way, but you're right. His base is infantile.
As for the writ of mandamus, I vaguely recall a teacher who required us to be able to define it on a written test. I'll bet I got it right then, but as with most tests where I memorized an answer, I forgot it the moment I handed in my test paper. But wasn't it nice of Gov. Abbott to provide us with a concrete example of when a writ of mandamus would be appropriate? Now I'll remember what it means.
Please, can the next story read to the MAGA babies be “Goodnight Loons”?
I read enough of the Politico story and then the first thought was "Mississippi Goddamn". Nina Simone had it right a long time ago. Ohio, goddamn.
I watched the CNN program last night, which had video I had not seen, all about how 1/6 had its roots long before. It went out of its way to talk about the Big Lie with the people it was interviewing, and they were nonrepentant, unresponsive and plainly brainwashed beyond repair. Even impending jail terms won't sway them. The interviewer did not permit them to tell lies without pushing back, but it was crazy to see a mother fighting leukemia pretty much abandon her son who was either a Proud Boi or an Oathkeeper, even though it breaks her heart. There has been reporting on people who regret their allegiance to the Orange Hindend, but I did not see that in the program.
Then, so excited this morning on NPR to hear Don Ganyay (however he spells his name--) report from Ohio about the privately funded (ha-- WE taxpayers are doubtless paying every cent--) lovefest by the Orange Monster and his minions. AND it was in the 9am news headlines. I immediately came home and wrote to NPR, and I included that their right wing bothsideserism is why I refuse to give them money. I know it does no good, but I was unclear why we have to listen to a headline, let alone a feature, on a conning, smug, killer of people who is no longer in office. I am not going to read the Politico story, as Charlie's nickname for Politico is Tiger Beat on the Potomac, and that is being kind... Ugh. Bad way to start the day.
@Jeanne: Yup, NPR is unacceptably bothsiderized. Ali Velshi of MSNBC started his show this morning with a quick rundown of the headlines. Somewhere in there he said, "And Donald Trump held a MAGA rally in Ohio where he told his usual string of lies," Then Velshi went on to the next thing. (I'm slightly paraphrasing from memory, but Velshi put the emphasis on the lies, and at least in the news rundown, he didn't say anything else about Trump.) Anyhow, that's my idea of accurate reporting.
@Akhilleus: When I was a little girl, we would often ask my father to repeat a story that was actually a poem by James Whitcomb Riley. It began, "Little Orphant Annie came to our house to stay." It ended, "And the goblins will get you, too, if you don't watch out." So here's your bedtime story:
Once upon a time, in a land too close to home, there was a big, fat ogre with orange hair. He was so mean that all the smart people in the town where he lived caught him and took away all the money he had stolen from them. Then they stuffed him in a big box and forgot about him. But they made a big mistake. The box they stuffed the ogre in turned out to be a huge TV, and all too soon the big fat ogre got a big fat blue suit and a very long red tie and started saying mean things on the TV.
The next thing the people knew was that the orange-haired ogre in the fat blue suit jumped right out of the TV and started saying all the mean things to all the people in the land. Now, the smart people who had stuffed him in the box all cried, “Look out! Look out! That orange-haired man is an ogre. He has cheated all the people. He tells nothing but lies. Beware! He will take over the land!” One little boy's father told his son every night, “Watch out, my boy. The ogre will get you if you don't watch out!”
But many of the people in the land were not smart. They were fools. And some of the fools were almost as mean as the orange-haired ogre. They did not listen to the smart people's warnings, but they did listen to the ogre's lies. “He tells it like it is,” they said. Soon the fools helped the orange-haired ogre take over the land.
When the orange-haired ogre ruled the land, everything he did was bad for the people. He took money from the people so he and his rich friends could have more. He told the army and the police to beat up the smart people. He put some of the people's children in cages. He took away the beautiful lands in the countryside. He made even the air dirtier. He made friends with all the worst rulers of other lands around the the world. He even fell in love with the worst of the worst rulers. He got mad at all the good rulers of other lands. He told thousands and thousands of lies to all the people. He told so many lies, nobody could count them even when they tried. The orange-haired ogre was very powerful. Many of the fools in his own land were so afraid of him they did everything he told them to do even when they knew what he told them to do was very, very bad.
When the ogre had nearly ruined the entire land, everybody was unhappy. Even many of the fools were unhappy. But that was not bad enough for the ogre. So he made everybody sick. The people were dying, and he would not help them. “If you want to get well, do it yourself,” he said. “Drink bleach!” More and more people got sick and died. Many of the people could not go to work. The children could not go to school. They could not see their friends. Each and every one was alone in a great land. A very strange thing indeed.
At last, even some of the fools realized they should have listened to the warnings. “I was foolish to believe him,” some of them said as they lay dying. So the good people who were left – and some of the fools – rose up against the orange-haired ogre. They sent him to a very hot, lonely island. He could not even talk on the TV any more. Now, this made the orange-haired ogre very mad and very sad.
Soon, the people stopped getting sick. (Except for some of the fools.) Many got their jobs back. Or they got better jobs. The children were happy to go back to school. They all started visiting with their friends again. They started feeling happy again.
This seems like a happy ending. But only fairy tales have happy endings. There will always be scary stories to tell because the fools will always be with us. So remember what the father told his son: “The ogre will get you, too, if you don't watch out!”
Marie, that is glorious!!
Marie,
Roald Dahl, Beatrix Potter, Frances Hodgson Burnett, and JM Barrie have nothing on you, m’dear. The mashup of their work, “James and the Giant Peach, Peter Rabbit, and the Lost Boys meet in the Secret Garden to sic Mr. McGregor and his pointed rake on the MAGAts”, couldn’t compete with your tale of the Orange Ogre. You’d need Mary Shelley for that. Or maybe Shirley Jackson. Or maybe both: “The Modern Prometheus Has Always Lived in the Castle”.